Few people like to admit that they can no longer do everything for themselves; even fewer are willing to ask for help when they truly need it. We all need to do those things of which we are capable, but we also need to be aware when help is needed. Many times such help comes from family members who mow the lawn, take the groceries into the house, or even pay the bills when eyesight fails. However, there are not always family members nearby, or they may not be able to provide for all of the needs of a loved one. When the time comes that services for yourself or for family members are needed, there are some things that it would be wise to keep in mind.

Identify the type of service needed.

Do you need help with household chores, home maintenance, or driving?
Do you need a person who is trained to transfer someone into and out of bed, administer medications, and provide personal care?
Do you need someone to live with you or a family member and provide services such as personal care, meals, and companionship?
Do you anticipate the need will be short term or long term?
Are you looking for assisted living or nursing home placement?

Learn about the agencies in your area that provides services.

A good place to start is with your local telephone listings. Look under the county or state listings for the Area Agency on Aging or check with United Way/Community Council.
If you have access to the Internet, do a search for aging services or council on aging in your area.
If you are in a rural area, check with social service agencies, libraries, hospitals, your doctor, church members/pastor.

What is your time table for establishing services?

It is good to know what services are available in your area ahead of time, if possible. A hospitalization or sudden change in the person’s health status can speed up the need for services. Check with the hospital about discharge planning/social services staff to assist you with this process. Write down questions in advance so that you are prepared when meeting with social services staff.

People always want to know what a service is going to cost, which usually includes conversation with family members about finances, insurance, and healthcare wishes.

Is the needed service something that may be covered by Medicare? For instance, skilled home health care that is usually short-term and ordered by a physician is covered by Medicare, but ongoing in-home services such as cooking, cleaning, and laundry are not covered. Approval of some of these services is dependent upon the person’s income level.
Does the older adult have Medicaid? Do you know what services Medicaid will cover?
Some people have long-term care insurance or other private insurance policies. Learn about the policy coverage and limitations.
How long do you anticipate needing the service? For example, someone who has fallen/broken a bone, is recovering from surgery, has uncontrolled diabetes and needs to start insulin injections and check blood sugars daily, someone who needs dialysis three times a week, or a person will Alzheimer’s disease will need services for varying lengths of time and of different levels.

Sometimes it is necessary to establish services from a distance. In such a situation, talk to the person’s pastor, neighbors, or health care provider for suggestions. Even with their suggestions, it is still wise to check out the person facility as much as is possible. Online reviews and the comments of the person’s friends may help you to determine the suitability for your needs.

There are many websites for people who are looking for resources. Check out www.eldercare.gov (1/800-677-1116), Family Caregiver Alliance (www.caregiver.org), and Administration on Aging (www.aoa.dhhs.gov). Also, you can hire a private care manager to research/set up services.

It can be difficult and frustrating to need services or to ask for help. Be patient with yourself and those trying to assist you, as you attempt to find the services that are right for you or your loved one.